The Things All New Yorkers Should Know (But Most Don’t)
Illustration: Millie von Platen
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In the spring, this magazine publishes a “Best of New York” issue, which attempts to make living here easier by surfacing the best florists, butchers, plumbers, and eyebrow waxers. This year, we took the idea in a more existential direction: What knowledge set is required to live in the city like someone who grew up here? And can we teach the newish New Yorker how to beat the system in everything from errands to entertainment to the emergency room?
We set out to assemble a big collection of municipal tips and tricks. We reached out to doctors, traffic attorneys, and particularly New York–y New Yorkers like Alison Stewart and Gay Talese, but most of the advice comes from the New York Magazine editorial hive mind. What began as a small Slack channel grew into a constantly humming conversation that begot some hacks that even the most grizzled New Yorkers among us hadn’t known till now. (Apparently you can walk into the Met through the parking garage?!)
Here, you’ll find no “fun facts” — while it’s interesting to learn that Central Park is bigger than the country of Monaco, it doesn’t make living here any easier. And we’re not promising a comprehensive list. Consider this a megacollection of scraps of wisdom one accrues over a lifetime of sitting in traffic on the BQE, or trying to get into a restaurant that just got a rave, or making mental notes about the tips rattled off by a friend of a friend at a dinner party over the weekend.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Most bodegas sell stamps.
You might be pleasantly surprised to find that your local independent drugstore is cheaper than Duane Reade and CVS. It also probably doesn’t imprison the Advil in plastic lockdown.
Not enough people realize Chinatown’s street vendors have incredible produce at very good prices.
The best birthday cake you can buy is the malted-chocolate-caramel cake from Lady Wong in the East Village.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
A great butcher shop — Prospect Butcher Co.’s two locations, Paisanos in Cobble Hill, Ottomanelli & Sons on Bleecker — is about more than good meat. The best will happily take care of any fussy task you want done — whether butterflying a turkey, deboning skin-on chicken breasts, or just talking through the best way to cook a porterhouse. Once you find a favorite, become a regular and make sure it stays in business. (Be sure to tip well for especially onerous tasks and during holidays.)
The Chateau Diana sold in every bodega is actually “wine product,” and it’s disgusting! Avoid.
If you want to make your own pizza at home, your local slice joint will probably sell you some dough if you ask.
You can do your interview for Global Entry at the National Museum of the American Indian at One Bowling Green.
Fairway’s roast chickens are well priced — $10 for a whole already-cooked chicken. And they’re pretty good!
Don’t judge a grocery by its cover. The milk at Union Market might be cheaper than the milk at Key Food.
You can often renew your driver’s license digitally, unless it’s been suspended or you let it expire. Check the DMV website before you show up in person.
If you do need to go to the DMV, the Fidi branch is the best in the city. You can renew your license within ten minutes — without an appointment — and the staff is friendly. The License Express on West 30th Street is pretty good too.
If you sell a car, don’t cancel your insurance until you return the license plates. “If you don’t, there’s a daily penalty for 90 days; after that, you can’t pay your way out anymore — your license will be suspended,” says traffic attorney Matthew Weiss.
Got a ticket? Get a traffic attorney, plead not guilty, and have them try to delay the hearing. “The points on your license can only hurt you for two years after the offense, so always try to delay your hearing for two years and then try to get it dismissed,” says Michael Spevack, a traffic attorney. Also: Fight every ticket, as they can be dismissed if the officer doesn’t show up to the hearing (because they’ve either retired or been transferred).
If you move, you have to notify the DMV of your address change within 30 days, but it’s also a wise idea to inform the Traffic Violations Bureau to avoid missing a notice and ending up with a suspended license.
For typewriter repair, try Jay at Gramercy Typewriter Co. (108 W. 17th St.; 212-674-7700).
If chairs need to be re-caned, call Sean at Veteran’s Caning (465 Baltic St.; 212-564-4560).
When clothing is moth-eaten, see Ronald Moore at French-American Reweaving Co. (119 W. 57th St.; 212-765-4670).
Lamp need repair? Call Richard at Lexington Hardware (797 Lexington Ave.; 212-838-5386).
My favorite tailor (he both repairs garments and makes new suits and jackets) is Sal Cristiano (138 E. 61st St.; 212-752-1638). Editor’s note: Sal is now semi-retired, and his son Carl Cristiano handles many of the repairs.
If you find yourself in need of a replacement toilet valve in the middle of the night, Nuthouse Hardware (202 E. 29th St., nr. Third Ave.) is large, well stocked, and open 24/7.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Instead of waiting on an endless line at the post office with a squirmy child for their first passport, you can book a very civilized appointment at the Central or Kings Highway branch of the Brooklyn Public Library.
It’s not hard to get rid of your dead dog (on a logistical level). The proper way to dispose of a deceased pet in New York, believe it or not, is to put it out with your trash in a heavy-duty black plastic bag with a little note attached describing the contents.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Always Use the 81st Street Entrance to the Met (and when it’s particularly mobbed, walk in — very carefully — through the parking garage on 80th Street.).
Buy your Broadway-theater tickets in person at the box office, not online, to avoid the fees. If you just need one ticket, walk up to the theater 15 minutes before a show and see if it has a cancellation. Now and then, it works.
If you want to see something new, weird, scrappy, ambitious, and usually cheap, try the Brick in Williamsburg, the Tank or Theaterlab on 36th Street, the Bushwick Starr, or Target Margin in Sunset Park.
Don’t see ‘Shen Yun.’
Illustration: Millie von Platen
If you have tickets to a hot show, arrive early and observe who walks toward the house seats about eight rows from the stage at center. It’s great people-watching.
The best night to see a Broadway show is Tuesday because there are fewer tourists and, if the show is dark Mondays (as many are), the cast is rested.
The Museum of Natural History opens an hour early around Thanksgiving and Christmas; you can have the Dinosaur Wing nearly to yourself.
Put in the hours to befriend DJs. They can often provide drink tickets and help you skip lines.
Always avoid Terminal 5. It’s still a pain to get to and has bad acoustics.
Sitting in the back car on the Cyclone roller coaster is scariest; it whips around like a tail.
Every summer for 119 years, the Naumburg Orchestral Concerts series has presented a slate of free performances.
The most jaw-dropping show of the holiday season is the La Guardia High School All-School Musical, a Broadway-level production almost entirely produced by teens. Tickets are $30.
A few times a year, you can see the Martha Graham Dance Company rehearse at its studio in Westbeth for $3; you’ll be sitting just a few feet away from the dancers.
Art galleries are required to give you a price list if asked.
The Film Forum Jr. movies are better, but you can get a Bloody Mary at Nitehawk’s kid screenings.
You go to the Angelika for the ambient subway noise. It’s the loudest in theater four. Don’t complain about it.
The Neue Galerie’s Filmbar is a deal. For $28, you get a ticket to an Austrian film, a large pretzel, and a drink.
It sounds cheesy, but the Classic Harbor Line’s foliage cruise up the Hudson is a glorious way to spend an October day.
The best outdoor concert venue is Forest Hills Stadium. Every seat has a direct view, and there is excellent food.
The crowds at queer bars the Rosemont, Cubbyhole, and Happyfun Hideaway are in their 20s. Henrietta Hudson, Metropolitan, and Singers have a slightly older mix.
When your friends from college visit, get over your pretension and just take them to Le Bain. When again will they ever see a Jacuzzi in a nightclub?
Illustration: Millie von Platen
If you ask politely, any bodega that sells weed (and many that do not) will sell you mushroom chocolates.
The New York Earth Room is the thinking person’s Donald Judd studio.
The city’s coolest nightclub is Mansions in Maspeth. It feels like you’re dancing in your grandma’s carpeted basement.
Forget day drinking at any of the Dimes Square bars (Clandestino, Forgtmenot, Le Dive). Opt for Bar Valentina, around the corner, where there is always a free outdoor table.
The Eagle NYC on early Sunday evenings is like the McSorley’s of gay treachery: a long-standing classic for a reason.
The Rockaway Hotel is good for an all-day brunch/swim/sauna/massage hang.
The Red Hook pool is double the size of most city pools and is rarely crowded.
Anable Basin Sailing, on a lot next to the East River in Long Island City, is the ideal spot for outdoor day drinking.
You can go whale watching from Sheepshead Bay. It costs $69 for a three-and-a-half-hour boat ride.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Tickets to Friday-night Brooklyn Cyclones games on Coney Island (from $25 per ticket) come with two beers, and everyone gets to run the bases at the end.
The ideal time to go to the U.S. Open is the day session of the middle Saturday of the tournament.
The best way to get affordable Knicks tickets is to stop by the box office 15 minutes after tip-off.
The best seat for watching Upper East Side ladies peacock is the bench outside Butterfield Market on Madison Avenue.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Just go to the Knickerbocker for dinner. Call 212-228-8490 and ask for a booth.
For the nights you can’t think of anything to cook: The Brooklyn Public Library has a fantastic collection of e-cookbooks, meaning everyone has access to thousands of professionally tested recipes, instantly and for free.
It is never worth paying the plating fee to take your own cake to a restaurant celebration. Just don’t bother. Bring candles if you must.
Or book dinner at Vinegar Hill House. It serves an excellent birthday cake, and you can order a whole one a few days in advance.
Barbetta’s backyard is also a festive place for a birthday — it has a giant fountain and an elaborate garden.
The bars that will most impress visiting family members are Darling, on top of the Park Lane, overlooking Central Park, and Bar Blondeau, on top of the Wythe, overlooking the Manhattan skyline.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
You can get Prince Street Pizza delivered to the Scratcher bar, on East 5th Street, and forgo the line.
The best place for a first date in Brooklyn is Dynaco in Bed-Stuy. Don’t overlook a piece of the chocolate cake at the end of the night if it’s going well.
There is no better place to have a difficult conversation — a breakup or a heart-to-heart — than Park Bar at the Parkhouse in McCarren Park. The Bloody Mary is excellent.
There are certain restaurants (Carbone, Tatiana, the Corner Store) where you really are not going to get a reservation unless you know someone. Or know someone who knows someone. Instead of trying to force your way in, why not go to literally any other restaurant?
For restaurant reservations: Always call first. You should resort to OpenTable or Resy (or, God forbid, Tock) only if a restaurant doesn’t have a posted phone number.
It takes all of three seconds to look up the health grade for any restaurant at a816-health.nyc.gov/ABCEatsRestaurants.
Go to the same restaurant on a few slow nights and be friendly (but not overly solicitous) to the host. They’ll likely remember and take care of you on the busy nights, too.
The famous mutton chop at Keens is actually lamb. It’s fine — but not so good that you should avoid a steak if that’s what you really want.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
The food at the city’s restaurant institutions — the oyster bars and steakhouses in every travel guide — is almost uniformly mediocre. Two exceptions: Katz’s, where the pastrami is better than anywhere else, and Joe’s Pizza on Carmine and Sixth, which is still the king of the classic NYC slice.
We’re all tipping 20 percent or more on the entire bill, and that’s that.
Best pretheater dinner: “The carciofi alla giudia at Lattanzi is incredibly good, as is the cacio e pepe, risotto alla Milanese, branzino, scampi angela, and tiramisu. The restaurant has white tablecloths and red curtains. It’s a beautiful, cozy place.”
Best post-theater dinner: “It really depends what theater you go to. You want to avoid crossing Times Square. If the play you see is east of Seventh Avenue, I would go to Cafe Un Deux Trois on 44th Street. I like the smoked-salmon appetizer, French fries, onion soup, endive salad, and spaghetti bolognese. If the play is west of Seventh Avenue, I’d go to Orso. It has a lovely quiet atmosphere. I like all the pizzas, and the carta di musica is a good starter. The swordfish is also great, and people love the calf’s liver, linguine with clams, and all of their specials.”
Best post-theater drink: “Glass House has a really nice bar downstairs with good food — a good burger, risotto balls, chicken club. It’s fun to sit at the bar and have a Manhattan. And you might see a lot of actors who just got offstage. Also Bar Centrale has a fantastic martini. It’s a very small space, though, so you must call ahead.”
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Tell your ambulance to go east. You can request the hospital your ambulance goes to, and you may want to opt for NewYork Presbyterian–Weill Cornell, Mount Sinai East, or NYU Langone. (The exception is if the EMTs determine you need a trauma center, in which case, trust us, you’ll want to listen to them.)
If you have an eye emergency after normal business hours, head to Mount Sinai Hospital’s Emergency Department or its urgent-care clinic, where the staff of the New York Eye and Ear Infirmary are on call at night.
If you have a child who might need to be admitted the emergency room, go to a children’s hospital. NewYork Presbyterian’s is in Washington Heights, Mount Sinai’s is in East Harlem, and NYU Langone’s is in Kips Bay.
Weill Cornell in Manhattan guarantees a private room for postpartum recovery without an extra charge.
If you find yourself in need of inpatient psychiatric care, NYU Langone is likely the best place you could end up. But if you need to commit someone against their will, go to Weill Cornell.
For preventive care and treatment for run-of-the-mill illnesses on the cheap, Ryan Health Centers are government-funded and offer services at little or no cost to patients, regardless of their insurance status.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
A Noguchi Museum membership is worth it for the lamp discount.
For special occasions, ask your restaurant of choice about low- or no-corkage-fee nights and bring your own bottle. On Monday evenings, for instance, corkage is only $10 per bottle at Hawksmoor; its cheapest glass is $17. (Restaurant wine markups are typically in the range of 300 percent.)
Flatbush Vet is a nonprofit clinic that offers affordable vaccinations and spaying and neutering, and the ASPCA Animal Hospital provides low-cost urgent care for those making $50,000 or less.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Fridays, Acme Smoked Fish in Greenpoint — a Zabar’s supplier — sells at wholesale prices direct to consumers. Preorder and get there at 8 a.m. to dodge the post-run-club lines.
The 40 & Under membership at the Chamber Music Society of Lincoln Center might be the best deal in town. A $20 sign-up fee brings the cost of each concert — which typically starts at around $45 — down to $20.
You’ll find the best cheap sushi at Ten Ichi Mart, where it’s half-off after 8 p.m.
Opening an account with the Lower East Side People’s Federal Credit Union or Brooklyn Cooperative Federal Credit Union reduces the cost of a monthly Citi Bike membership from around $18 to $5.
The Soho Rep offers $20 rush tickets for almost every performance.
If you are a student, you can get $20 tickets at Signature Theatre.
Joining the Theater Development Fund (better known as TDF) gives you access to advance discount tickets, and many people are eligible, including retirees or anyone 30 and under or who works in the arts, or who is a freelancer.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
NYU College of Dentistry provides discount services — including aesthetic procedures often not covered by insurance, like teeth whitening and veneers.
The American Barber Institute offers $3 haircuts — just keep in mind that its barbers are in training. (Still, for $3, how bad is a slightly uneven trim?)
Free one-year memberships at many cultural institutions, including MoMA, the Shed, and the Central Park Zoo.
A slew of discounts, including $2 drip coffee or cold brew at Partners Coffee and $10.75 AMC Theatres tickets.
30 percent off ski tickets at select mountains.
Heavily discounted access to Broadway shows and concerts. (Last time we checked, Beyoncé tickets were going for $100 apiece.)
Membership discounts for New York Road Runners, FightCamp, Blink Fitness, YMCA, Chelsea Piers Sky Rink, Bike New York, and more.
Ichiran is free for kids 8 and under.
The Staten Island Children’s Museum offers reciprocal membership with the Brooklyn Children’s Museum, the Transit Museum, and the New York Hall of Science — and a family membership is just $85. (Memberships at the other museums go from $15 to $115 more than that.)
Illustration: Millie von Platen
The ice rink at Bryant Park is free if you bring your own skates.
You can borrow a steel pan drum from the Brooklyn Public Library as well as other musical instruments. Midtown’s Stavros Niarchos branch hands out seeds for gardening.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Rehearsal rooms make great spaces for a solitary hour. Try Mark Morris Dance Center ($10 to $22 per hour) or the Brooklyn Conservatory of Music ($10 per hour).
If the main branch of the New York Public Library is crowded, cross the street to the Stavros Niarchos Foundation Library. The rooftop terrace never seems to get very busy. Otherwise, use the small branches, not the big ones.
The New York Society Library on 79th Street at Madison Avenue, the oldest library in the city, is a quiet place to read or work, and tea is served at 3 p.m. Membership is $270 per year.
Go to Wave Hill for a less crowded botanical-garden experience.
The Conservatory Garden is the most tranquil part of Central Park.
Go to Brighton Beach for a quiet beach day, then walk to Coney Island in the evening.
There’s peace to be found in the Emerson Hill neighborhood of Staten Island, especially if you enjoy looking at the homes of wealthy people. You can see the Corleone family’s house from The Godfather.
Any large department store, like Bloomingdale’s, is a good bet.
Many super markets, including some Trader Joe’s, have a bathroom.
Churches let you go. St. Patrick’s Cathedral’s is in an old confessional.
The Bryant Park bathroom has attendants, flowers, classical music, and self-changing toilet-seat covers.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Evens = East (That Is, Traffic on Even-Numbered Streets Goes East.)
When driving, take 18th, 20th, 35th, 39th, or 51st Street to get crosstown. Major cross streets (34th, 42nd) are for amateurs, 36th and 37th Streets always have traffic because of the Queens-Midtown Tunnel, and 22nd and 65th Streets also always have traffic. Avoid 49th Street because of Rockefeller Center.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
There’s a giant fan at the end of the northbound Union Square Q platform that’s a lifesaver on really hot days.
If you’re lost in Central Park, find a lamppost. The first two or three numbers on it will tell you what cross street you’re closest to.
If you live on the Upper East or Upper West Side and own a car, some doormen or porters will move your car on alternate-side-parking days for about $40 a week, so your monthly bill will be, say, roughly $200 instead of $800 for a garage. Ask around.
If you bike, carry a foldable helmet with you. The Closca Loop (starting at $100) is the one you want.
If you’d rather not spend a small fortune on parking at JFK, drive to Ozone Park, where plenty of streets don’t have alternate-side parking (so you can park without fear of ticketing). It’s usually then just an inexpensive Uber ride to the airport.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Obvious, but bears repeating: Stand right, walk left.
When coming back to Grand Central on the Metro-North, you can exit the station quickly without encountering the crowds. Sit near the back of the train and walk to the northern end of the platform rather than to Grand Central Terminal. (Note it’s not wheelchair accessible and open just on weekdays.)
Citymapper is by far the best transit app. It has transformed multiple members of the ‘New York’ team into non-late people.
On Manhattan cross streets, even-numbered addresses are on the south side — except on 1st and 2nd Streets, which are flipped.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
On summer-weekend ferries from Wall Street to the Rockaways, paying extra to reserve a spot is worth it. Those lines get long, and you don’t want to be stuck without a seat.
A ten-pack of ferry tickets comes to $2.90 a pop. Nothing makes life feel worth living like ferry-commuting home.
There are bars onboard and a Monday-through-Friday happy-hour deal.
The Astoria Ferry offers beautiful views of Manhattan, and the Astoria stop drops you a not-too-far walk from the best Greek food.
Force yourself to pocket your phone and look out at the water: Occasionally, on the Rockaway Ferry, you can see dolphins.
The best place to sit is the very back of the upper deck next to the stairs, where it looks like you’re not even supposed to sit.
Illustration: Millie von Platen
Enter the housing lottery when you’re in your first low-paid job. Keep applying annually until you get in — or you make too much to qualify. This year, some apartments are available to single applicants making more than $125,000, and you can have even more in assets, provided you don’t own property. (If you land one, you can stay indefinitely, even if your income rises past the cap.)
A thorough apartment search takes time; the last thing you want is to have to say “yes” to a god-awful place because you just need something. So before you search, try to get your landlord and roommates to agree to a month-to-month lease or the option to sublet if you find something else quickly.
Before you sign a new lease, look up your landlord on whoownswhat.justfix.org. It will show the other properties they own, evictions they’ve filed, and building-code violations. Also ask to see the history of rents paid on your unit to ensure you’re not being overcharged.
To find a cheap apartment, call those phone numbers you see posted outside buildings. Some rental buildings — especially big old ones, which tend to have rent-stabilized units — list the numbers for supers or agencies near the front door. If an apartment listing’s monthly rent ends in a non-round number, that often means it’s rent stabilized.
Brokers don’t always post the exact figure for rent-stabilized apartments. If you see a listing that looks vaguely promising but lazy (blurry photos of big dated rooms), that might mean the broker knows the place will rent without much effort. Call right away — it’s faster than emailing — and go see it as soon as the broker can meet you.
The Metropolitan Council on Housing has a free tenants’-rights hotline at 212-979-0611. The experts there will talk you through any issue you’re having with your landlord — current or future — with great enthusiasm.
If you’re buying a co-op, never ask the co-op board about future refinancing before you are approved and close on your shares. Instead, check the building-management company’s website about refinancing rules. But do refinance every chance you get (when rates drop) and work your home like a slot machine. You only live once.
Illustrations (portraits) by Joe McKendry
